A couple of weeks ago, a person at work said to me that he was trying to figure out who he was and what he should do with his life.
Wow, what a task!
At first glance, it seems very easy. Who am I? A quick look at my driver's license tells you my name, my height and weight, and where I live.
But these are just facts. Does that really tell anyone who we are? If it is not the facts about ourselves what defines a person? Our faith? Our moral values? Our hopes and dreams? Our life goals?
... I'm not sure. All I know is that I am about 12 years older than the person who told me that, but that I am still struggling with the same questions in life. When I first looked for answers, I was probably the same age as he is right now. By now, I doubt that there will ever be an easy answer. I will never wake up in the morning thinking: Oh, this is who I am and I want to do exactly that for the rest of my life.
What a scary thought! Knowing who you are and what you are supposed to do for the rest of your life, seems almost like a punishment. Being defined and captured in a certain life for the rest of your life sounds very dull to me.
On the other hand, not knowing who you are and what you are supposed to do with your life also bears its risks. After 12 years of searching, I know the downside. If we constantly search for answers about ourselves, we miss out on life. As my Godfather once said to me: At the end of your life, it is not like you can say: Hey, I would like to get the 3/4/5 years back that I spent worrying/ being angry/ or searching for myself. We can't put life on hold, it is constantly moving.
I thought about this for a long time, and for me - which does not have to apply to anyone- I came to the following conclusion:
1. I will set myself goals in life. Goals that seem good and honorable for right now. Nothing keeps me from changing them later on. But I cannot aimlessly search and wonder through life without a goal.
2. Whenever I will have to make a decision, I will keep my goals in mind. My life needs to have a direction.
3. I will acknowledge that all my actions and decisions have consequences. Consequences that influence not only me and my goal, but also the people around me and their goals. Life is always interaction with other people. Whatever I will do, I will do in agreement with my moral values, the virtues I believe in, and my faith.
4. I don't believe what defines me is what I do. I believe what defines me is who I am, and who I am striving to be, the good I believe in.
